Thursday, September 30, 2010
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
L♥ve, L♥ve, L♥ve.
the greatest thing you'll ever learn is just.. to love,
... and be loved in return.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Friday, September 17, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Oasis
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| The Lord is my shepherd --- that's RELATIONSHIP! |
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| I shall not be in want --- that's SUPPLY! |
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| He makes me lie down in green pastures --- that's REST! |
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| He leads me beside quiet waters --- that's REFRESHMENT! |
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| He restores my soul --- that's HEALING! |
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| He leads me in paths of righteousness --- that's GUIDANCE! |
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| for His name's sake --- that's PURPOSE! |
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| Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death --- that's TESTING! |
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| I will fear no evil --- that's PROTECTION! |
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| for you are with me --- that's FAITHFULNESS! |
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| your rod and your staff, they comfort me --- that's DISCIPLINE! |
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| You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies --- that's HOPE! |
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| You anoint my head with oil --- that's CONSECRATION! |
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| My cup overflows --- that's ABUNDANCE! |
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| Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life --- that's BLESSING! |
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| and I will dwell in the house of the Lord --- that's SECURITY! |
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| forever --- that's ETERNITY! |
Psalm 23
1 The LORD is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
2 He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
3 He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the LORD
Forever.
we are officially 20!
i was someone else when you came into my life. but i knew from the first time you made me laugh that you were meant for me. now u made me what i am.happy, contented, secured. &you've been mine for 20 months & 2 days already. i don't know how we made it through that first year, seeing as all we did was argue & fight,not to mention the worst adjustments we ever did . but you believed in us, sometimes more than i did. i often wake up and wish that we could fast forward through now and start our lives together. but when i really think about it, why rush? you're mine forever, might as well soak up every second. i never wanted to be one of those people who had been mushy about love,not even the type who had already dreamed what their wedding's gonna be like way ahead of time, but things have a funny way of working out. so here's to loving you more with every beat of my heart.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
say cheese!
cheesy corn.
korn kernels with cheese powder in a cup (not actual pic). thanks eir friend!
if you asked me to..
the very first song i dedicated to him that he liked. and has become his favorite. :)
my big-hearted hipee.
My hipeeness. A big sucker--
--for my tears..:)
no matter how fumin' mad he is, a drop of my tear is the only "antidote" it needs.
and funny as it sounds but he is the type who cries first when he knew he just hurt me. he cries when i cry, before he starts nagging (babbling on how i should stay strong,etc..)
He is always in rebuke everytime i cant help but snap out on someone for doing something not so " my way", or for not sparing even the "trike" driver of my "taray" stunts, but he laughs the loudest after i tell the story.
Overly-honest. Even those i dont feel-like knowing. Having "what i dont know wont hurt me" for a motto is an exact contrast of "honesty 101" of his. The disadvantage (as for me only): he expects the same in return.exempli gratia: a detailed all-day activities, or a run-down at least. (so i better be careful not to miss something, worse if he learned it from someone else and im expected to tell him first hand, worst if it involves sensitive topics).
"Chika-chika" is his favorite.hehehe.pasttime. My silence is fatal. and when i am, its already a big wonder if i am still the rachell with the double "L".
We both love to eat eat & eat. He has a weird taste though.
He always worries about me that i sometimes get annoyed and think he is just over-acting with all the reminders that i better suggest to myself to have a list for "memory-gap's" sake. :-P
He is a toughie-toughie not just a cutie -‿◕
He loves to dance,while i love to sing (to a different music though)haha!
He is east, i am west. Lucky if we meet halfway sometimes.
In short, we are extremely opposite in almost every way.
He is a kiddo at heart. He loves to dream. of things that you cant help but smile. (but my dreams are simpler than his, and he knows what "simple" really is for me) :-P
and, the most fave of mine..actually only one of my faves-- is when he panicked when i am about to reach my boiling point [he must be thankful though, it rarely happens] yahaha!
and lastly, he has a "marshmallow" heart. not only to me, but to everyone he cares about.
He can be your boy-scout next door, or a 911 agent to a neighbor.
CHELLYڪے (◕‿◕✿) (his fb note)
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| http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/note.php?note_id=392008124795 |
I have always thought that a long distance relationship couldn't really be possible for me.. but things happen unexpectedly. isnt that how it always works? like a big Ooops! I didnt plan on falling in love.. but oh well "I did" -- big time!
The whole thing started with something that really got me laughing (It's a secret for us to keep). eventually we started messaging each other then came the long talks which has become a part of our routine, like literally all night and day..
Things are so simple and easy when we talk, so wonderful, so perfect, I have never laughed so hard, we have the same interests, political views, feelings, thoughts and ideas. she could easily explain things I could never understand or I never could have figured out and in some way she was the only one I could talk about things I couldn't tell to anyone. the more we talked the deeper we get to know each other. There was never a weird silence in the middle of anything. Though we also had our bad days, our differences didn't matter.. we got real close, you could say we became the best of friends. we got so comfortable that we get to share everything..
I wasn't actually looking for anything serious at that time. just a friend to talk to since my life was so messed up, I had no directions, and talking about my involvement with girls which I knew was really a big puzzle to her, I ddnt know how to handle my feelings back then and being with someone new while still stucked with my past is giving me a real hard time dealing with, I was miserable and unhappy yet having her around just makes everything so light and smooth..
It started getting a bit more serious as time goes by, talking everyday.. hours flying by.. staying awake all night, just talking. That's what we'd been doing.. All modes of communication are being overused and still not enough.. we clicked in every way.. no words are needed and yes no doubt that I have actually fallen inlove with her, everything happened so fast.. The next thing I knew we were together --so inlove!
My idea of having someone special is not that defined though I used to set standards or shall I say having the dream girl that any muslim guy would wish for.. One you could describe as her exact opposite considering her lifestyle and all, the same way i was also the so not her type of guy but we ddn't see em and it never was an issue with us instead when she came, it completely altered me in ways that I cant even understand, only then I looked at her and saw something else.. now I know what it was --MY FUTURE.. she was the kind of girl I would like to be my last, as cliche as it may sound, that is how I thought and still think of her.. until now..
For the first time in my life, I don't want anyone else, and I don't want to be with anyone else. I can't even imagine my future without her by my side and every single day that I wake up I feel the excitement.. just couldnt wait to spend the rest of my life with her, to fall asleep with her in my arms and wake up the next morning to watch her sleep. I always pray for that day when all my dreams and wishes would finally come true..
One day.. I will marry her.. no matter what it takes or how far i have to go.. i will get her.. someday!
The whole thing started with something that really got me laughing (It's a secret for us to keep). eventually we started messaging each other then came the long talks which has become a part of our routine, like literally all night and day..
Things are so simple and easy when we talk, so wonderful, so perfect, I have never laughed so hard, we have the same interests, political views, feelings, thoughts and ideas. she could easily explain things I could never understand or I never could have figured out and in some way she was the only one I could talk about things I couldn't tell to anyone. the more we talked the deeper we get to know each other. There was never a weird silence in the middle of anything. Though we also had our bad days, our differences didn't matter.. we got real close, you could say we became the best of friends. we got so comfortable that we get to share everything..
I wasn't actually looking for anything serious at that time. just a friend to talk to since my life was so messed up, I had no directions, and talking about my involvement with girls which I knew was really a big puzzle to her, I ddnt know how to handle my feelings back then and being with someone new while still stucked with my past is giving me a real hard time dealing with, I was miserable and unhappy yet having her around just makes everything so light and smooth..
It started getting a bit more serious as time goes by, talking everyday.. hours flying by.. staying awake all night, just talking. That's what we'd been doing.. All modes of communication are being overused and still not enough.. we clicked in every way.. no words are needed and yes no doubt that I have actually fallen inlove with her, everything happened so fast.. The next thing I knew we were together --so inlove!
My idea of having someone special is not that defined though I used to set standards or shall I say having the dream girl that any muslim guy would wish for.. One you could describe as her exact opposite considering her lifestyle and all, the same way i was also the so not her type of guy but we ddn't see em and it never was an issue with us instead when she came, it completely altered me in ways that I cant even understand, only then I looked at her and saw something else.. now I know what it was --MY FUTURE.. she was the kind of girl I would like to be my last, as cliche as it may sound, that is how I thought and still think of her.. until now..
For the first time in my life, I don't want anyone else, and I don't want to be with anyone else. I can't even imagine my future without her by my side and every single day that I wake up I feel the excitement.. just couldnt wait to spend the rest of my life with her, to fall asleep with her in my arms and wake up the next morning to watch her sleep. I always pray for that day when all my dreams and wishes would finally come true..
One day.. I will marry her.. no matter what it takes or how far i have to go.. i will get her.. someday!
a broken heart .. [from his blog]
Most people had relationship in their past that didnt work. most people have at least one such relationship that is very hard to let go of. This is the one that got away, but shouldn't have. This is the one that felt as if it was meant to be. This is the one that felt like true love yet just would not work..
As a guy, its pretty normal not to usually think too much about the whole “heartbreak” thingy, but i gotta say, this is definitely one of the hardest i have ever had to deal with. i dont even know how to handle this stuff.. yeah i’ve had my share of heartaches before but i must admit, this one is far different than those..
She is the girl i wanted to spend the rest of my life with, i probably would’ve done anything to save “us” but sometimes no matter how you want to make it work for some reason it wouldn’t, simply because you want her to have that freedom --to do her thing and just let her be free on whatever she wishes to do, act or even dress up comfortably knowing that she might not be as comfortable with you watching or complimenting and so on..
There have been other girls in my past, its only her whom i considered to be the mother of my kids, the one who i dream to kiss good night and wake up with her by my side, im all set for that, been wishing and praying for all of it to actually come true.. i guess that explains why i am having a hard time with everything that is happening now, im not usually this weak when it comes to heartbreaks, i am more of the “ah ok” and ” leave em as it is” type but damn it hurts so bad and i feel so helpless that i dont know what to do, im just so lost, it seems like there’s just no way to get over it, after all i cnt just turn off my feelings. im not a machine, a computer or laptop that can be rebooted and everything will be all right. I'd be lying if i say i dont wana move on from all of this. I wish i could get up and feel different, be different, wake up and not hurting from the thoughts that haunted me through the night. wake up, and forget she ever existed –forget we ever existed!
Its been few days and im still not ok.. cnt forget how much i love her. how much i wish i could mend whatever is broken or at least mend what is broken with in me now. i cnt even think or look at someone else, maybe for a second i entertain the idea but then there comes the tightness of my chest, it pours out. no doubt, she is still everything to me. I cnt imagine what or where i would be without her.. I see her everywhere, whatever i do, wherever i go would always lead me back to her, there’s no escape, no matter how i try to shoo it away the more it gets into my system..
Hmm it took awhile for me to understand that letting go doesnt mean you dont care for someone anymore, It just reached a point wherein i needed to let go not because I WANTED to but because i NEEDED to.. though a part of me is still hoping that, Someday.. Somehow.. Somewhere.. in the time that we both dont expect, who knows our path will cross and maybe.. Just maybe –-IT WOULD BE OUR TIME!
As a guy, its pretty normal not to usually think too much about the whole “heartbreak” thingy, but i gotta say, this is definitely one of the hardest i have ever had to deal with. i dont even know how to handle this stuff.. yeah i’ve had my share of heartaches before but i must admit, this one is far different than those..
She is the girl i wanted to spend the rest of my life with, i probably would’ve done anything to save “us” but sometimes no matter how you want to make it work for some reason it wouldn’t, simply because you want her to have that freedom --to do her thing and just let her be free on whatever she wishes to do, act or even dress up comfortably knowing that she might not be as comfortable with you watching or complimenting and so on..
There have been other girls in my past, its only her whom i considered to be the mother of my kids, the one who i dream to kiss good night and wake up with her by my side, im all set for that, been wishing and praying for all of it to actually come true.. i guess that explains why i am having a hard time with everything that is happening now, im not usually this weak when it comes to heartbreaks, i am more of the “ah ok” and ” leave em as it is” type but damn it hurts so bad and i feel so helpless that i dont know what to do, im just so lost, it seems like there’s just no way to get over it, after all i cnt just turn off my feelings. im not a machine, a computer or laptop that can be rebooted and everything will be all right. I'd be lying if i say i dont wana move on from all of this. I wish i could get up and feel different, be different, wake up and not hurting from the thoughts that haunted me through the night. wake up, and forget she ever existed –forget we ever existed!
Its been few days and im still not ok.. cnt forget how much i love her. how much i wish i could mend whatever is broken or at least mend what is broken with in me now. i cnt even think or look at someone else, maybe for a second i entertain the idea but then there comes the tightness of my chest, it pours out. no doubt, she is still everything to me. I cnt imagine what or where i would be without her.. I see her everywhere, whatever i do, wherever i go would always lead me back to her, there’s no escape, no matter how i try to shoo it away the more it gets into my system..
Hmm it took awhile for me to understand that letting go doesnt mean you dont care for someone anymore, It just reached a point wherein i needed to let go not because I WANTED to but because i NEEDED to.. though a part of me is still hoping that, Someday.. Somehow.. Somewhere.. in the time that we both dont expect, who knows our path will cross and maybe.. Just maybe –-IT WOULD BE OUR TIME!
Love in the hands of fate♥ [an import from my "realdeal" blog]
it was one fateful latenight battle with insomnia- a usual struggle of driving myself to sleep, when i did this very simple gesture which i never thought would really make a big shift in my life.it just all strted with a simple “hi” i made few months ago.
love indeed is never really a feasible thing =)
Initially, i was just fond of him, he was quite so fun to talk with, and i was almost everything he would never ever want to get involve with,=p. As we both were of the same view, little did we knw that something was already weaving.. there was a sure note of our’s falling for each other with every passing day.. We knew we liked each other but neither did he nor i show up the mounting feelings we were keeping all along.
love indeed is never really a feasible thing =)
Initially, i was just fond of him, he was quite so fun to talk with, and i was almost everything he would never ever want to get involve with,=p. As we both were of the same view, little did we knw that something was already weaving.. there was a sure note of our’s falling for each other with every passing day.. We knew we liked each other but neither did he nor i show up the mounting feelings we were keeping all along.
We started talking more often- i love talking to him like i never really felt before with a guy - or atleast not in a long time. He was a tough guy, too much stiff , almost like a heartless harsh soul- kinda straight-forward and inconsiderate while i was a sarcastic free spirit with a helly care on things. i was like always ready with a logical answer, “I live in reality, i don’t need people who loves to cause drama in my life - a practical specie thats so typically me. Never had i seen it coming. he was a nice guy, had a great sense of humor and the thing i liked in him was that he was sophisticated in a very simple way. He was a perfect example of “simplicity at its best”. We spent good times together, talking all night long from topics like nonsense stuffs up to our innermost feelings ( from wacky issues to serious ones- even sex vs lovemaking? haha). Often we were caught laughing over so silly things and end up realizing were such like dorks and idiots and we cud only care less.
Everything about him simply amuses me. When I realized all of these, my feelings began to shift - oh wait.. no, i guess its more of the feelings shifted first before i decided to have a change of mind (and heart?hehe)
he simply gave me all the best feelings that i could not even give reason to..
and now i started looking at the stars (even if its always raining here=P)wishing for some silly wishes with eyes closed and with a tight fist on the left while fingers crossed on the ryt haha. my wishlist?: well i think i cud share some: sleeping at night snuggled next to him or cuddled up so gently and waking up at nights just to see him sleeping innocently with a cute smile on his face..(so prfect) It wud be very beautiful & heartwarming i know..
Everything about him simply amuses me. When I realized all of these, my feelings began to shift - oh wait.. no, i guess its more of the feelings shifted first before i decided to have a change of mind (and heart?hehe)
he simply gave me all the best feelings that i could not even give reason to..
and now i started looking at the stars (even if its always raining here=P)wishing for some silly wishes with eyes closed and with a tight fist on the left while fingers crossed on the ryt haha. my wishlist?: well i think i cud share some: sleeping at night snuggled next to him or cuddled up so gently and waking up at nights just to see him sleeping innocently with a cute smile on his face..(so prfect) It wud be very beautiful & heartwarming i know..
We became quite good friends( as a start). I sometimes was a sentimental girl, a complete emotional- wreck.. and alas - i had opened up with him even the most sensitve issues of my life and everything about me.
He was just opposite to me just as i am the opposite of his ideal girl.then he strted teasing me a lot for my “artistic” looks coz of my dressing style.. well, he got lots of styles too that sometimes just makes me mad though he was nvr really aware of it. he even hurt me at some points without even having a lil idea at all but somehow I never could stay angry on him for more than an hour or so.. I always knew I had those teeny weeny hots for him from day one (hmm?was it day one?haha)..
He was too choosy when it came to his dream girl (she has to have that something over her head - that i even wondered if he was looking for a princess diana reincarnate?haha. According to him, she should be someone kinda all wrapped-up , whereas here i am, an all too fabby girl who’s so carefree with whatever she wishes to wear and whatever she wishes to flaunt - see the difference? haha.. I knew he would never see me as someone he could be with
someday- well thats what i think!.. But not all things could really be predicted and planned. we just cnt forewarn ourslves either, as to what is really in there, days after..
well i did forewarn myslf? it was like a mind over matters of the heart thing?haha I tried my best to snatch myslf away from him but no gains - to no avail i kept on looking at his pic (wahaha).. I used to have these creepy creepy vibes causing goosebumps in me everytime i felt something either so sudden or so
unexplainable or simply just so unacceptable like so yikee and so “baduy” for me - and yet all i could do is sigh*..was it a sort of being in a state of oblivion?(my own style of being the denial queen?haha) but no - its my choice to embrace it..
He was too choosy when it came to his dream girl (she has to have that something over her head - that i even wondered if he was looking for a princess diana reincarnate?haha. According to him, she should be someone kinda all wrapped-up , whereas here i am, an all too fabby girl who’s so carefree with whatever she wishes to wear and whatever she wishes to flaunt - see the difference? haha.. I knew he would never see me as someone he could be with
someday- well thats what i think!.. But not all things could really be predicted and planned. we just cnt forewarn ourslves either, as to what is really in there, days after..
well i did forewarn myslf? it was like a mind over matters of the heart thing?haha I tried my best to snatch myslf away from him but no gains - to no avail i kept on looking at his pic (wahaha).. I used to have these creepy creepy vibes causing goosebumps in me everytime i felt something either so sudden or so
unexplainable or simply just so unacceptable like so yikee and so “baduy” for me - and yet all i could do is sigh*..was it a sort of being in a state of oblivion?(my own style of being the denial queen?haha) but no - its my choice to embrace it..
i just luvit! the teasing games that would last for hours..walking out and turning about face few secnds aftr,haha it was all very sweet sweet and romantic.. It was a good, funny start.. The next days and weeks after, were just simply great: great times, great talks, loud hearty laughs- imagining him like me
hugging him & kissing his neck from behind or those “coded greeny stuffs” we used to share like the not so french suck kiss he said, down to the kkh and bf with kms then rolling over in bed and finally the lm thing,hahaha.. every day is a height.gr, cant totally explain ..it was all spontaneous, nothing planned at all.. this is one of the most passionate things that ever happened to me in a long time.. Well, our days after that very frst night of “simple gesture” , went about even perfectly ( not literally prfct coz we also have our different versions of “topaks”- i just prefer to call it perfect coz thats what&how i felt?[charing,haha].
And the most unexpected yet the best thing that happened- we ended up falling in love with each other knowing all the possible dangers & hassles of such a kind of relationship: complexities,conflicts,differences, clashes, doubts, fears, arguments, petty issues - pasts, girls, k’s & g’s as he said.. but it just didn’t matter to us, all we knew was that I loved him and he loved me.. exchanging sweet nothings and promises just feels so perfect- im scared too cant deny that but im just holding on to this faith that this unique long-distance relationship will work -just me & him …and i can content myslf on that for now - i know everything else will just follow, im only leaving it all to the hands of fate- ilovehim - that plain&simple.. and nothing else matters…
hugging him & kissing his neck from behind or those “coded greeny stuffs” we used to share like the not so french suck kiss he said, down to the kkh and bf with kms then rolling over in bed and finally the lm thing,hahaha.. every day is a height.gr, cant totally explain ..it was all spontaneous, nothing planned at all.. this is one of the most passionate things that ever happened to me in a long time.. Well, our days after that very frst night of “simple gesture” , went about even perfectly ( not literally prfct coz we also have our different versions of “topaks”- i just prefer to call it perfect coz thats what&how i felt?[charing,haha].
And the most unexpected yet the best thing that happened- we ended up falling in love with each other knowing all the possible dangers & hassles of such a kind of relationship: complexities,conflicts,differences, clashes, doubts, fears, arguments, petty issues - pasts, girls, k’s & g’s as he said.. but it just didn’t matter to us, all we knew was that I loved him and he loved me.. exchanging sweet nothings and promises just feels so perfect- im scared too cant deny that but im just holding on to this faith that this unique long-distance relationship will work -just me & him …and i can content myslf on that for now - i know everything else will just follow, im only leaving it all to the hands of fate- ilovehim - that plain&simple.. and nothing else matters…
Im posting this just to share how wonderful i felt inside - wonderful momnts, wndrful chances, wnderful twist of fate..
Distance just doesnt matter guys, if the love in your heart is true and pure…believe me, i ve been there too - a non-believer of a long distance affair - but ive come to realize that if it indeed makes you happy?then why not give it a shot? happiness isnt like a freebie that u cud just get along with a random item you pick at a store - so might as well hit it back once it hits you - true happiness might just struck once and no “what ifs” could anymore change the course of everything once youve decided to let it flew away =)
for now, I will just be waiting for him .. for “my sundo”..
he is my accidental mentor and this is a lesson i learned by chance: Never underestimate the amazing power of love to change hearts and mindsets. Love can even give fresh inspiration to tackle what seems to be impossible.
he is my accidental mentor and this is a lesson i learned by chance: Never underestimate the amazing power of love to change hearts and mindsets. Love can even give fresh inspiration to tackle what seems to be impossible.
long distance..
this isn't the easy kind of relationship. takes extra effort. conveying emotions are a lot more taxing. but i guess, its just a question of "is it worth it?" my boyfriend and i had been together for 20 months now. and i must say, it's been a tough journey. there were humps & bumps, ups & downs. 'twas a roller coaster ride indeed. just like any other couple, we went thru all kinds of craps, but the only thing that defines us from the others maybe is that we never give up. he has always been worth the fight for me. i would not dare trade him for anything in the world. i have adjusted my plans for him, i have "architected" alternative solutions from a-z just to fit everything and make complicated situations a lot more bearable. he kept strong in times i get weakened and i maintained my sanity in times we almost lost hope. working it all out was never a paved way. we protected each other. we disappointed each other. we loved each other. we challenged each other. we got each other. We frustrated each other. We wanted each other. We hurt each other.
but in the end, it's still "us" who matters. having found home in each other..
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